Made it through Thanksgiving

I made it through Thanksgiving. The day itself wasn't horrible because I was busy and spent the day with my family, which was good for my soul. There's nothing like hearing Axel say he wants to play cars with Oma. 

It was Friday that was hard. Randy & I would always go get our Christmas tree the day after Thanksgiving. There is a tree farm not far from us where every tree is only $25. Doesn't matter how big or small, they are all $25. When we got the UTV, Randy figured out a way to strap the ladder onto the UTV so that we could take the it to get the tree. I carried on the tradition this year, ladder attached to the UTV, put on Randy's flannel and headed to the tree farm in the 40-degree weather. I'm sure people probably were wondering why I was crying as I looked at trees. More than once I thought about just going back home, but I knew I'd regret it later. I found my perfect tree, checked for a straight trunk and got to sawing. I securely strapped the tree to the ladder and UTV, and back home I went. I even remembered to spray the tree with Ortho before I brought it into the house.

I tend to go a little Clark Griswold with Christmas decorations outside. Randy always put up the icicle lights and then sat back and watched me figure out lights, extension cords, inflatables and all their placements. He'd usually cringe a little when he saw all the extension cords, and I'm fairly certain I'm one of VEC's favorite customers this time of year. I managed to figure out how the icicle lights went up and questioned why I was putting up the rest of the lights when I really didn't feel like it. But, as Randy told me more than once, I'm stubborn and determined and so I finished the job.

The tree and lights are up, and the house looks like it should be full of holiday cheer. Looks are deceiving. If you looked inside, you'd see me sitting alone, missing Randy, figuring out the holidays and how to navigate my grief. And you know what? That's okay this year. 





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