Grief is Weird

Five years ago today, March 12, 2020, I flew to Minot, ND because Randy had outpatient surgery scheduled for March 13. This was after Randy kept telling me he could drive himself home after being knocked out for surgery - that was a big NO from his doctor and from me.  March 2020 was about the time the pandemic really started to take off. I remember after surgery Randy wanted to stop at Marketplace to get groceries (he was still feeling good from all the great drugs he was given) and there were signs with limits on toilet paper and people were stocking up on groceries and paper goods. It was like the world had gone crazy in those few hours we were in the hospital. Randy's was one of the last elective surgeries completed before everything was shut down. Today, exactly 5 years later, I got up early and flew to North Dakota for a completely different reason. Tomorrow the State of North Dakota will honor Randy in both the Senate and the House, and on the 7 month anniversary since his p...

Everyone grieves differently, and there is no time line on how long you grieve. I think in one way or another you grieve for the rest of your life. There are those dreaded firsts during the first year, which is where I am. A couple of weekends ago I went to my first Terra Ambassador Breakfast and Group Run. I was talking to one of the other women there, and she was going to work after breakfast and had to skip the run. I asked her where she worked, thinking retail since it was a Saturday morning. She told me she worked at a funeral home and told me which one. Without even thinking I said "oh, you cremated my boyfriend last August" (yes, I really said that) When it dawned on me what I said, I started to laugh, then she started to laugh. She thought I was going to say "Oh you cremated my dog, or cat, or bird, so this is a first".  It's funny who God puts in your life. The one thing I remember in the first few days after Randy passed was how kind everyone was at th...